


And if you should stumble, remember I’m near

by Nife



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Pining Shiro (Voltron), but i know what i am, honestly who shiro pines for is obvious, i honestly just want shiro to be happy, i might multipair, wahahaha
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-27
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-06-17 00:33:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,045
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15449379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nife/pseuds/Nife
Summary: Here is what my brain played with when it thought about shadam, or more Shiro and Adam having a good heart to heart. It’s not actually shadam, since they both acknowledge that they’re done as a couple. Still, wanted to tag for those sensitive to this pairing.





	And if you should stumble, remember I’m near

“God, it’s good to see you,” Adam said in one breathless near gasp, just taking in Shiro with all the open awe and adoration that Shiro once coveted.

In a moment of rest, a break between battles, Adam had sought Shiro out. He strode to him with purpose and almost desperation in his eyes, something sad and happy and so many other things wrapped into one. It felt overwhelming to see those beautiful blues looking up at him, all the things dancing about, his own reflection so clear.   
  
“Adam,” Shiro replied, holding Adam in turn, arms upon his in a clasp. “I- you-” he stopped, a helpless chuckle escaping. So many things he wanted to say, so many thoughts and feelings he’d had, all trying to escape past his lips in a flood. “You look good…I mean, could do without the wear of active combat, but still. It’s good to see you too.”   
  
“Oh Takashi,” Adam laughed too, another panting thing. “You always know what to say…such a charmer.” Happiness crinkled around his eyes, moisture giving them a sheen, even as it softened his features. “I’m serious though, I’m glad to see you.”   
  
“I was serious too,” and just like that the man who held the name ‘Takashi’ came back from the dead, bright and happy, and all the things he thought he’d lost. “Sorry that we couldn’t meet again without the galra.”   
  
Adam shook his head, the smile only gaining the hint of an edge before it softened again. “That’s…just what it is,” he shrugged. Then, a pause, as if taking Shiro in all over again, looks of pain and sadness, joy and disbelief, all flickering through in an instant. “I didn’t come here to talk about that,” he stated, voice not quite short, but interrupting the flow of the previous conversation.

 Now it was Shiro’s turn to look sad, to step back and smile with a thousand different things that hurt as they brushed against all that had been lost. “Adam…I,” he started.

“I know,” Adam interrupted with a sigh, looking guilty and anxious. “I know that we said goodbye, I know that we both meant it and…it had to end, at least for me,” another sound escaped him, just short of miserable. “I’m not here for that either. I’m not going to try to rekindle…us. I promise. I just, I wanted to see you. When Commander Holt, when Sam returned, but not you, not Matt, I was devastated, even as he explained why. I always-” a short breath, like a gasp of pain, “I wanted to apologize, because when that happened, when we parted, I shouldn’t have- I should have-” he stopped, trying to get the words out and stumbling.

Sympathy filled Shiro, kind and warm. Maybe it wasn’t like the love he’d felt before, but there was still care there for this man, one who had almost been ‘husband’, could have been if there’d been better times where he wasn’t dying, where Adam couldn’t bare his burdens anymore. Gently he ushered the man over to a nearby seat, nothing more than a bench, but at least more comfortable then standing there.   
  
“I can’t believe you’re still like this,” Adam laughed wetly, the tears rolling along his lashed, dripping down his face in streaks. “Still trying to help, still being good and kind to people, even people like me.”   
  
“People like you Adam?” Shiro replied, a sad huff of a laugh of his own escaping. “Helping organize a resistance, fighting for everyone on Earth with everything you have? That kind of person?” Gently he thumbed those tears away.

“I broke your heart Takashi,” Adam said miserably. “I knew what I wanted was…selfish, I knew that you wanted to live as loudly as you could as long as you could…and instead of simply accepting that I couldn’t do it anymore, I gave you an ultimatum, then left you.”

“Adam,” Shiro called, tilting his head up to meet his eyes. “I forgive you, I forgave you back then. It sucked, but it’s life. We wanted different things, both for ourselves and of each other.”

That didn’t seem to have the effect Shiro wanted, Adam only looking more miserable. “You forgive me so easily, like it’s a simple thing,” he said. 

“It is simple,” Shiro insisted. “Look, I’ve been kidnapped by aliens, fought those kidnappers with other aliens in lion shaped warships. This, this is very simple in reflection. So, yes. I forgive you, I’m sorry it happened as it did, but I’m glad we’re both here, alive, and able to have this conversation. I really believed at one time it wouldn’t happen.”

“Well, when you put it that way,” Adam huffed, smile returning in a paler form. “It really does seem simple.” He took another breath, before sitting up straighter, pulling away just enough that they weren’t huddled against one another. “I am sorry, for the record. Well and truly.”

“You’ve said as such,” Shiro grinned, which earned him a warmer one in reply.

“I know, but there it is in full,” Adam said, gently running his hand over Shiro’s still human arm, a friendly gesture rather than intimate. “I actually wanted to say so many things to you, how much I missed you, how sorry I am, how good it is to see you, see the pup too.”

“You know Keith hates when you call him that,” Shiro grinned, a hint of teeth and mischief poking through.

“It’s what he is, your loyal and fiercest friend, following you around with that happy aura,” Adam replied with the same look. “He found you, kept you safe, saved you when you needed it…which was a lot from what I heard.”

Shiro blushed, despite himself, scratching his chin. “Yeah, he might have had to pull me out of the fires a couple …dozen or so times.”

Adam only laughed, more genuine, less breathy then before. “He’s a good kid, and he loves you. I’m glad you have him.”

“I am too,” Shiro replied, a warm look spreading from his face to his body, relaxing his shoulders for the first time since Adam had started the conversation.

For a moment they sat, peaceful in their quiet, each reflecting. It came as no surprise that it was Adam who pulled them both from it. “You look …alive, which is good, but also more at peace…oddly.”

“Oddly? Oh yeah, the being a paladin and fighting a war,” Shiro laughed. “I look at peace?”

“Perhaps that isn’t the word,” Adam replied, “you look less like you’re trying to run away from your own life…or mortality. Just living as it is, even as you plan ahead, no longer afraid.”

“Dying does that to a man,” Shiro nodded sagely, only flinching at Adam’s flat look. “Er,” he stuttered, “It’s a long story. But, hey! I got a cure for that disease! I’m no longer going to die! Well of that.”  

“Fucking Christ Takashi,” Adam replied, rolling his eyes. “I see you didn’t find a cure for that absolutely morbid sense of humour.”

Shiro laughed out loud, eyes bright with mirth. “You’ll be happy to know that Keith appreciates that about as well as you do.”

“Probably even less, since he’s the one constantly saving you. I think I know what to get him for his birthday. A toddler leash…in extra, extra large for you. We can even put a little black lion backpack on it.”

“Kinky,” Shiro smirked, wiggling his eyebrows.

With a groan Adam pushed Shiro’s face back, but he was smiling, honest and wide. He dropped his hand down, into his own lap. Another moment where he just stopped and looked, really and truly took Shiro in. It made the man in question almost squirm, not quite nervous, but on the edges of it.

“Still handsome as heck, I know,” Shiro tried for more humour, not able to keep quiet.

“Yes, but that never changed,” Adam replied, gently cupping Shiro’s face. “Bigger now though,” he teased.

 “A bit,” Shiro replied, trying for the same tone and failing as a flush brushed up to his ears. Even if they’d already agreed that they weren’t going to go back to what they’d had, this was still the man he’d loved once, who’d looked at him like he held all the stars in the sky.

But, Adam was kinder now, and dropped his hand before either of them did something they’d regret later. “This looks good on you, this peace, this happiness,” he said gently. “This new love.”

That made Shiro start, blinking owlishly. “Love? Uh, what are you talking about?” he laughed, the nerves from before jolting right back up.

“You can’t tell me that when I see that light of love flickering in your eyes, I know Takashi, because that once was mine,” Adam smiled, a small sad and nostalgic thing that bore less pain then it might have once, years before their final fight, and the mission that saw them split apart.

Shiro openly gapped at him, unable to help it. “You- how-” he rubbed his head. “Fine, you caught me,” he groaned.

“I always do,” Adam laughed, kind even as it rang with mischief. “At least in this. I know you Shiro, time hasn’t changed who you are, not at your core.” He gentled his expression and posture. “Do they know?”

“No,” Shiro grumbled, “and please don’t tell them.”

“I wouldn’t,” Adam answered, still bright with humour, and soft with kindness. “But you should.”

Shiro groaned, rubbing his head again. “Can we go back to the ‘so glad to see you, you’re hella jacked now’, instead?” He pouted at his friend who just laughed back in response. “Okay, rude.”

“Takashi Shirogane, ace pilot, breaker of every record the Garrison ever had, hero of Kerberos, the universe at large, paladin of the black lion…” he laughed again at Shiro’s flat look. “What, you have a lot of titles now, but I’ll get to my point. What I was trying to say was; you’ve taken on the whole damn universe, survived so much…only to be afraid of a little confession?”

“It’s not ‘a little confession,” Shiro grumbled in return. “It could be a big rejection, actually, scrap that, it _will_ be a huge one, and that could screw up our group whole dynamic. And if that weren’t bad enough, they’re really not interested …like that.”

“In you as a man, or-” Adam asked.

“I don’t know…they love someone else, okay? Just…leave it alone,” he didn’t mean for his tone to dip into a pained growl, but he was already dealing with so much, why would he add this to it?

Adam gently laid a hand on Shiro’s arm, concern plain on his face, even at being snipped at. “I won’t say anything to them Takashi, I swear it,” he said, soft and gentle with Shiro’s fragile little heart. Even if it made him feel indignant, it was also nice that Adam still cared enough to be this careful with him. “I won’t even goad you into confessing. Just-” he sighed, looking down before back up. “You deserve happiness, you deserve to reach for it. You’ve always deserved more than the world gave you, more than I did.” His eyes shawn with that same sad nostalgia from before. “Even if it ends with nothing…I want you to know that you can, you can reach, you can fall…and this time I’ll be here to catch you. It won’t be the same as before, but I will be, as your friend, as your family.”

Without reserve, Shiro chuckled, though not a happy sound, not forlorn either. His face pinched in sadness, regret, anger, and for the first time in a long while, relief. He tried to talk, choked on it, and let it go with another sigh. “Thank you,” he managed after another attempt.

“You’re welcome,” Adam replied, pulling Shiro in, and resting his head on his shoulder. They sat in another moment of silence, easy and peaceful as they had once known, even if now it had a different warmth. They were good, or something close, and right now, that was enough, at least for them.


End file.
